The Universal Page

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Oh, you accursed Dadaists, with your anti-utopian visions! You led us on, you killed the dream. And only now do I understand: there is no algorithm. Oh, you accursed Dadaists.

(Note that the hubris of the Universal Page’s grandiose vision is deliberate satire, and that Randall Packer’s Eulogy to the Dream is part of the joke. The work is meant to poke fun at starry-eyed new media utopianists who believe that the internet — or any medium — could possibly bring about world peace and universal accord. The message: it just doesn’t happen. All you’ll get is gibberish.)

That’s a Huge Breast!

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It’s a few days late, but better late than never: things you can only say at Thanksgiving.

1. Talk about a huge breast!

2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.

3. It’s Cool Whip time!

4. If I don’t undo my pants, I’ll burst!

5. Whew, that’s one terrific spread!

6. I’m in the mood for a little dark meat.

7. Are you ready for seconds yet?

8. It’s a little dry, do you still want to eat it?

9. Just wait your turn, you’ll get some!

10. Don’t play with your meat.

11. Just spread the legs open and stuff it in.

12. Do you think you’ll be able to handle all these people at once?

13. I didn’t expect everyone to come at once!

14. You still have a little bit on your chin.

15. How long will it take after you stick it in?

16. You’ll know it’s ready when it pops up.

17. Wow, I didn’t think I could handle all of that!

18. That’s the biggest one I’ve ever seen!

19. How long do I beat it before it’s ready?

20. I’ve never felt so stuffed!

Zzzz.

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I’m a very eloquent sleeptalker. My classmates say I even used my Sean Connery accent.

Deadpan Paeans

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Though I’m still up at 7am and still writing, the writing is turning out to be sort of fun. I really love being able to use phrases like “reinterpretation of meaning from subject through the use of an external intermediary” or “serious concepts of new media represented as deadpan paeans to a stereotypical utopianism” — and really mean it. Suddenly, 6-8 pages just feels like too little space. I might not even have to use 12.5pt double-spaced Courier New after all.

Knight Rider Intro text

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“A shadowy flight into the dangerous world of a man who does not exist. Michael Knight, a young loner on a crusade, to champion the cause of the innocent, the helpless, the powerless. In a world of criminals who operate above the law…”

The Knight Rider intro blurb would have the phrase “In a world,” wouldn’t it?

Update: The video itself:

Bzzt!

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The lab door is metal, the microwave handle is metal, even my iBook’s trackpad gives me a sizzle when I touch it. Stupid static charges.

Sunday Ctrl-R

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Saturday night to Sunday morning was spent in the MA Digital lab, finishing the Laudomia Director piece for Interaction Design class. Compiling the projector was not the end of it, though; I had to conduct user testing sessions with five strangers — a task I accomplished the same night, by lurking about the building and ambushing other all-nighters like myself. Feedback was good, and I was able to apply the necessary revisions immediately afterward.

The hour being too late — too early? — for the light rail or subway, it seemed most prudent to plonk down on the couch to rest till dawn. I had originally intended to meet up with the MICA Koinonia group at 8am to try out worship at Central Presbyterian, but fatigue and urgency led me to the easier, gentler course of going home to freshen up, followed by worship at Old Otterbein Methodist. I did not regret it: the service was beautifully uplifting, a traditional liturgy with hymns and responsories, a heartfelt reading of Isaiah by the pastor, and an open communion which touched me to my heart with its poetically simple majesty.

Heading back to school, I stopped at Starbucks in Harborplace for a quick mocha. From upstairs, the view of the Inner Harbor was so breathtaking that I had to pause and pull out my pencam for a panoramic photo.

I believe in God. I believe that He knows how weary I am in the midst of these trials, and I believe that He gives Sundays like this so I may know that His hand does not always rest so heavily on His children. For that, I’m grateful to Him.

Refreshed in spirit, I’m back in the lab, working on my Natalie Bookchin research paper, due on Tuesday. I’m not quite sure how I could possibly survive the next three days, but I know He will carry me through. My part is to keep my eyes fixed on Him, always.

More Excellent Name

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From Mark Byron’s latest Edifier du jour, this phrase jumps out: “…having become as much better than the angels, as He has inherited a more excellent name than they.” (Heb 1:1-5)

According to Mark Byron, “Jesus does have a more excellent name than any angel, but the word ‘name’ means more than what we commonly use it for; it’s referring to reputation and honor.” So that pretty much blows out of the water the Rubenian cult’s misinformed notions that the concept of a “new name” is justification for Ruben Ecleo’s claims to Messianic reincarnation. Or for anyone else who claims his own name to stand for Christ’s on that basis.

(Thanks for the info, Mark!)

Going to SFO for Christmas

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I’m going to be in San Francisco this December for a good friend’s wedding, and I’ll be staying through Christmas till the 26th at my brother’s place in Foster City. Anyone want to meet up? I intend to be a blatant sightseeing tourist, complete with camera around my neck, loud Hawaiian shorts, and hairy legs.