Maalat

maalat: (Tagalog, adj.) Salty.

With the grocery closed and the refrigerator lacking any fresh or frozen ingredients for a decent dinner, Paulo decides to eat tonight what he was planning to have for breakfast in the morning: two hotdogs with rice and a boiled egg. He boils the hotdogs in a pot with the egg while simultaneously reheating rice in a tupperware, then drops the boiled hotdogs into the tupperware with the rice, and pours a small mountain of salt (for the boiled egg) onto the overturned tupperware lid. He carefully balances the overturned lid atop the plastic vessel, then places the freshly boiled egg beside the small mountain of salt.

Wrongly balanced under the weight of the egg, the lid promptly flips upright into the tupperware, scattering salt all over the hotdogs and rice.

Paulo proceeds to eat the newly salted meal anyway. He will no doubt notice the aftereffects of his increased sodium intake at his next date with a sphygmomanometer.

Update: Okay, a bit of explanation. As with most Asians, Filipinos eat lots of rice, and one of our preferred quick-cooking meals is any kind of processed meat served with steaming hot white rice. Hotdogs and ketchup are an old classic, but longganisa (linked sausages), beef tapa (cured fried beef), tocino (fried sweet pork) Ma Ling (pork luncheon meat with toxic lead and mercury additives), spam, and bacon are also popular favorites. When combined with a fried egg, the suffix “-ilog” is added to the name of the dish, a play on “itlog,” which is Tagalog for “egg.” Hence you have dishes called tapsilog, longsilog, tocilog, spamsilog, dogsilog, bacsilog, malingsilog, and so on. (Okay, I made up the last four three two.)

TupperIlocano

Beep beep!

From: Mom

ive sent u mango jam. keep d nice plastic containers, will get it from you when i go der coz will refill them. strong kasi my ilocano blood.

Yup, I’m part-Ilocano. This text message explains why I’m so obsessed with washing and keeping even the smallest disposable plastic food holders. Utensils, too.

Monday at the Museum

For the MLK holiday, I hopped on the MARC and the Metro with a friend* and headed down to the National Gallery of Art to look at Trompe l’Oiel paintings and works by Vuillard, Vermeer, and Ingres. Then we went to other Smithsonians to look at spaceships, skeletons, and bugs.

There was also a Bible Bus (that’s a school bus decked out with bible verses) going around the Mall, with a loudspeaker on top telling “evil warmongers” President Bush and Billy Graham to repent of their sins and stop killing unborn babies before God “burns America like he did Sodom and Gomorrah.”

(Oh, and the coffee at the Museum of Natural History takes about as long to prepare as it took the dinosaurs to evolve.)

Bad Similes and Metaphors

Cringe-inducing figures of speech. (Googled from an an entry by Sara.)

My personal favorites:

The red brick wall was the colour of a brick-red crayon.

John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left York at 6:36 p.m. travelling at 55mph, the other from Peterborough at 4:19 p.m.at a speed of 35mph.

Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

iCal Icon

Cute. I just dragged iCal into my Dock, and the icon changes to show the current month and date. Useful for OS X users unwilling to hack the menu bar clock.

Later: Oh, now it only updates the calendar when I open iCal. Whatever.

The Walters

I went to The Walters with a couple of friends today to look at Medieval Art. Lots of Virgin Maries about. I was especially intrigued by an ivory carving showing the Annunciation and conception of Christ, with God the Father in the upper corner, His long, flowing beard zooming towards the Blessed Virgin in the shape of a dove — God the Holy Spirit about to conceive God the Son. His beard. Yup. Also lots of beautiful illuminated psalters, missals, and scriptures.

I also went to the garage sale at MICA and got me a rocking TV chair: the kind that sits on the floor and rocks. Ten dollars, but I had to carry it on the train all the way home to Little Italy, and it still smells of cigarette smoke. But it’s nice and comfy and I like it. So there.