Things I learned from watching Spiderman 2: [SPOILERS!]

• Columbia University students sure are mean. Whap. Whap whap. (Sound of schoolbags hitting head.)
• A nuclear fusion reaction looks just like the sun.
• When nuclear power is at stake, no one will really care that the complex artificial intelligence behind your robotic arms is probably even more revolutionary than your fusion breakthrough.
• Metal fusing with your spine won’t kill you after all; it just makes you more susceptible to said artificial intelligence.
• The happy music and freeze frame mean that things have changed, it’s all fine, and the hardship is ended.
• In a world where the man on the street can sell a Spiderman outfit on eBay, the Daily Bugle still does its front-page layout by non-computer-assisted paste-up. And no one has a mobile phone.
• It’s probably not a good idea to be involved with the grumpy landlord’s daughter.
• You can always trust a subway car full of New Yorkers to keep your secret identity.
• All you need to stop a runaway fusion reaction is fresh, cool, clear water from the Hudson River.
• You can run away from the wedding ceremony right on the day itself, and accountability is not a problem, any more than it was in The Graduate.
• The Asian busker lady at the corner sure knows her Marvel Saturday morning cartoons.

Overall, an excellent film, quite effective at portraying the overwhelming burden of humanness lying beneath the superhero’s costume. Spiderman 2 was, in some ways, quite reminiscent of that other comic book adaptation where the hero’s internal conflict leads to him giving up his powers for love and humanity: Superman II, still one of the best superhero movies ever made.