With regards to the question of “What Would Jesus Drive?”, I refer you to the lyrics of If There’s a God in Heaven, He Drives a Silver Thunderbird, which I heard sung by Marc Cohn:

Don’t you give me no Buick / Girl, you must take my word / If there’s a God up in Heaven / He’s got a silver Thunderbird / You can keep your El Dorado / Man, the foreign car’s absurd / Me, I wanna go down / In a silver Thunderbird.

Case closed.